Friday, 19 August 2011

Having A Frame Of Mind For Success

By Erik Teichmann


What is success? Colossal amounts of energy go into following the lives of people who are "successful", and nevertheless for most of us the kind of victory of, say, a Brendan Fevola1 or a Paris Hilton2, is just not what we would want for ourselves. Success for us might signify getting that job, hitting our perfect weight, finding that boyfriend - or being the boyfriend everybody wants to find, increasing our economical belongings to a particular point, regardless of whether that be longed-for comfort or vital wealth ... Or that favourite of mine: the free will and joy that comes from being fully at comfort with yourself. So what is your own personal mountain, the one you aspire to climb and take pleasure in the view from?

Once we have a clear idea of What success would mean to us, it's time to look at the How. It really is a much-loved slogan that it's 80% (or 95% or or ...) about the state of mind and 20% skill set, and although I think that is wildly blown out of proportions, it's true that without the state of mind you're expected to get nowhere in any area of your life.

The first, and I think non-negotiable, feature of this is the perception that you will succeed, and this needs to be present not merely on a conscious level, but also - and specially - on an unconscious level. If we don't think we can succeed, there will always be fear, hesitancy, the search for Plan B, "Yes, but ..." and "What if it all goes wrong?" That consumes a great deal of energy and concentration - why will you ever put yourself through it?!

The second thing is a readiness to take "risks". Now, we all have several different thresholds, and it's important to keep that in mind. Nevertheless, staying in our "comfort" zone means, really, remaining where we are now, and for the majority of of us there will come a time when that does not look like something we would like to be looking back on 20 years, or even 6 months, down the track. So risks, here we come! Start small, and work your way up the ladder!

Thirdly, what communication are you sending yourself? Yes, you can note down your affirmations and gratitudes and put stickers on the refrigerator or bathroom mirror!

Even more important than this are the messages you send yourself with your actions. Three days before I began my training as a coach I hung up my board pens and walked (factually) out of the office and away from my teaching job. In my condition not truly a risk (I could simply go back), but I was sending myself a message: I'm not a teacher; I'm a coach. Coaching is "what I do".

There's a good deal more that could be written about this - numerous books have been, in fact. But the most significant questions you need to ask yourself are:

Do I want more success in any area of my life?

And am I engrossed in doing what it requires to accomplish that?

1 a very popular Bad Boy in Melbourne; he's amazing at kicking pieces of leather between wooden sticks, apparently.

2 I've still not discovered what she's good at...

Live the difference Life Coaching is based in Melbourne which offers transformational one-on-one coaching both face-to-face and on the phone. People come from all walks of life and live in and around Melbourne, interstate and overseas.




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